Musical Mondays: 29/31 for my 29th Birthday

This coming weekend I will turn 29.  I feel like I just have to share this Garfunkel and Oats song 29 31... In this song they're singing about relationships and one plays a 29 year old and the other a 31 year old.  Though I have to admit that sometimes I feel like 31 already! haha

Skip to about 0:49 to get to the song and skip the boob talk-or listen to it.  It's funny.  I wanted to share the version from their Netflix show, but embedding is turned off for it.  The show is funny-you should totally check it out.

This week's song:

29/31

by Garfunkel and Oats

Note: There is some minimal adult language so if it bothers you skip it. :) 

29-For the first time in my life I see it clearly, I realize the power of being a woman

29 years old and time's on my side, I'm in my prime, I've hit my stride

I've got so much charisma and so many options, It's nice to always have my pick

31-THERE'S NOBODY LEFT, I'M ALL ALONE

29-I'm at the top of my game, possibilities are endless, and I just feel really pretty

I'm holding out for someone who meets my standards, wont settle for anything less than perfect

I know what I want and I can have it, I'm surrounded by love and peace

31-THERE'S NOBODY LEFT, I'M ALL ALONE

Why did I wait? What's wrong with me? In two short years I'm gonna be 33-who the hell will want me then?

My ovaries are shrinking I'm disgusting and everyone feels bad for me, and I never get invited to dinner parties anymore

29-Things unfold when they're supposed to 'cause everything happens for a reason

It'll happen for me when I'm not even looking-he'll just appear and I'll just know

And he'll love me forever without any work, who needs to try when things are meant to be?

31-THERE'S NOBODY LEFT-I'M ALL ALONE

29-I'm a catch just look at me, I'm smart and hot and have lots of interests

31-YOU'RE SUCH AN IDIOT

29-The man of my dreams is definitely out there

31-YOU THINK YOU'RE SO SPECIAL BECAUSE PEOPLE TELL YOU THAT NOW

29-He is my future, he's the one, and he has perfect looks

31-BUT THAT WILL STOP AND BE REPLACED WITH LOOKS OF PITY

29-My life's complete, the world is a buffet of love - a lalalalalalalala

31-Oh what, you think biological reality doesn't apply to you and your adorable cocoon of agelessness?

Well it does. While you're just waiting around and focusing on you GUESS WHAT?

YOU'RE GONNA MISS YOUR F*CKING WINDOW!

29-Everything happens for a reason, you know I truly believe that

31-Yeah you said that before

29-Oh my god it does though, everything happens for a reason

31-What about the Haitian earthquake or cellulite on skinny women?

29-Just say 'Hey Universe I'm ready' it'll happen when you least expect it

31-Well I don't expect it at all now so I guess it's right around the corner

29-Maybe you're putting out the wrong vibes, maybe you're closed off to love

Let me tell you a secret, it's called the secret

31-Here's another secret, you're an a**hole.

29-Your negativity is a self-fulfilling prophecy the reason things go well for me is because of positivity

31-Well I'm positive fertility always begins to atrophy when infantile fantasy eclipses true reality

29-It never once occurred to me that things wont work out perfectly 

When god closes a door you see he opens a window

31-You realize that's a smaller opening right?

You used to be able to walk out a door and now you have to climb out some slightly ajar window somewhere

Possibly falling like eight stories to your death?  That is not an upgrade.

You know what else? 

31-THERE'S NOBODY LEFT

29-Seven billion people on the planet my options will never end

31-I'M ALL ALONE!

29-I'm so happy, all the way happy, I'm so happy 31-AAAHHHHHH!

29-You can't love someone else until you love yourself  31-AAAHHHHHH!

29-You can't love someone else until you love yourself  31-AAAHHHHHH!

29-I'm so happy, all the way happy, I'm so happy 31-AAAHHHHHH!

29-You can't love someone else until you love yourself  31-AAAHHHHHH!

29-You can't love someone else until you love yourself  31-AAAHHHHHH!

29-Because life is good/31-Over

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