My Heart's Too Big for My Own Body

Sometimes I think my heart is too big.  Too big for it's allowed to do, too big for the people I love, and even maybe too big for me.  All I want to do is be able to open myself up to loving without the aching, but that seems impossible.  I love with everything I have and then some-I love until it hurts, and hurt it does.  Why can't I just love without letting it tear me apart from the chest out?

I love everyone.  I love my friends, my family, perfect strangers, and the men I date-whether I'm "in love" with them or not, I love them all a little, to varying levels.  All of these loves hurt sometimes, that's just part of life and it's something you come to expect from the world.  There are wars, there are mistakes, and there is so much room for error.  We're all just human after all.  We're all just hurting in some way or another.  We're all damaged and sometimes we take that damage out on other people, sometimes we sit alone in our homes and swim in our own damage, and sometimes we work on our damage.  Life is a cycle, we've all been beaten and bruised, and we all have to accept that in one another also.

Most of the time, I love that I love everyone and feel like good about loving and continuing to love even when I'm not loved back.  It just keeps going.  This heart of mine keeps beating, and I just keep on loving.  Sometimes though, I wish I could love just a little less.  I wish I could hold onto some of that love for myself instead of giving it all away... Instead of pouring it into the people I want to pour it into me... Because they're not always capable of filling me up as I try to fill them.

And that's okay.  You can't go around loving and expect everyone to just love you back.  You have to give without expecting to receive, and you have to accept people for who they are and what they're capable of.

But sometimes?  Sometimes it's hard.  It's especially hard when you don't save a little of your love for yourself.  I'd really like to learn to save some love for myself so that when I run into those moments where someone can't give me the love back I'll be okay.  I'd like to be able to focus on other things, and enjoy life without torturing myself wondering why they can't (or won't) love me back.

I'm going to go ahead and end here by admitting that I may have already had two glasses of wine and listened to this song three times while I cried. MAY. Okay, I did. This song just resonates with me, as most of Mary Lambert's songs do.

This week's song: 

Monochromatic

by Mary Lambert

Every morning it's the same thing

Sidewalks of people with who cares stares

My heart's too big for this city

My heart's too big for my own body

My heart's too big for you to understand me

When I close my eyes I dream in color

My life's in black and white, will it ever get better?

I'm not monochromatic

Nobody is monochromatic

Everybody is hurting

There's nothing more human than that

See the pieces of hearts missing

Watch how the light fills the cracks

My heart's too big for this city

My heart's too big for my own body

My heart's too big for you to understand me

Please understand me

When I close my eyes I dream in color

My life's in lack and white, will it ever get better?

I'm not monochromatic

Nobody is monochromatic

You're not monochromatic

<a href="http://www.mysocalledchaos.com/search/label/Musical%20Mondays" target="blank"><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtV_QpFuWBTwQpTCc7Em7jiVq3BuJNTezvriGP4loOKnoXMiFwZDw6ALEWjpQEnPKkrCx8OiyOvKnv2NLAUTGqO4Hn9gOlsd4Nor5UZo-V1r7oJmiivpnKAyRwYwT5eXlui8JBFkybxUJN/s1600/MMNewButton.jpg" alt="Musical Mondays at My So-Called Chaos></a>

Musical Mondays is a weekly linky party where you can share songs or other music-related posts each Monday and link up with the linky.  Then you can enter the monthly giveaway and visit the other music posts linked up. To join us:

• Write a blog post sharing music or something music-related.
• Include the Musical Mondays button (code below) and/or a link back.
• Link-up in the linky below. (NEW-It's going to be a month long linky, so feel free to add links through the month!)
• Visit other Musical Monday links in the linky.
• Enter the Giveaway below.

This month's giveaway is for a $10 Amazon eGift card!  You can spend it on music, books, or whatever your heart desires.  If international, I will just do $10 Paypal Cash.  Giveaway is open Worldwide and ends on July 1st at 12AM.  Entering below agrees to all terms and conditions within the Rafflecopter.

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Musical Mondays: Secrets

Well, I've put myself out there again.  I mean I've had dating sites active again for a while now (remember when I deleted all of my dating profiles?) but I haven't been actively responding or attempting to meet people.  This weekend I changed my mind.  I logged in, I replied to a few people, and I even struck up a conversation with someone who seems really interesting-someone who I'm actually interested in meeting.  

If you go by history, or the version of the "rules" for dating that everyone else seems to follow, this is where the games begin.  This is where you tone down who you are until a few dates in, you resist texting or calling so that you will have the power (or at least not look like a clingy freak), and where you start batting your eyelashes like some damsel that's just waiting on her knight in shining armor.  

Well, I'm over it. 

I'm not playing.  I like games with cards, and dice, and little plastic figures you move around a board.  I do not like games where the pawns are people and you're pitting emotions against trust.  No fun.  Sure, there can be an amount of excitement that makes dating like a game, but why does it have to be a delusional game?  Why does it have to be the kind of game where the only moves you make have the intent to fool someone?  Dating should not be about suckering someone into liking you before you show them your true self and just hope they deal with it.  

So I'm just going to be.  I'm going to be honest, I'm going to text if I want to, and I'm going to say what I want to say.  If someone doesn't like that me, I'm not going to try and trick them into liking a fake me before I reveal it.  They can just move on.  I don't want to be with someone who plays those games with me, so why would I play them with them?  

This week's song:

Secrets

by Mary Lambert

Musical Mondays: I Wanna Get Better

When it comes to making changes, sometimes, you can really only make lasting ones if you actually want it.  I mean really want it.  You have to want it with every fiber of your being-and that want has to drive you.  That want has to push you harder than you've ever allowed yourself to be pushed, and it has to keep pushing you even when you get discouraged or start to lose faith.

Sometimes it's hard though.  What you want can seriously clash with what you're willing to do, and you really have to evaluate and weigh out whether you're willing to do the things you don't want to in order to get the things you want most.  That's hard.  Sometimes, it's even harder when you're battling inner demons... The voices in your head.  Those things hold you back and sometimes convince you that what you want isn't worth it.

There are things I think I want more than anything.  Things like a relationship with a nice guy or to finally lose all this weight and get healthy.  I know what I have to do for both, but year in and year out I somehow find myself in the same place battling those same demons.  Have I lost the weight?  No.  Have I found a lasting relationship?  No.  Have I put in the work?  For a little while, then I get discouraged and lose the battle.  So, no.  

Let's break it down, shall we?  If I want a relationship I have to put myself out there. I have to actively date, meet new people, and give them a chance further than the first date before giving up on them or on myself.  I can't hide from it.  I can't chicken out.  I just need to bury the fear that I'm not good enough, or my fear of losing my independence, or my fear of getting my heart broken and TRY.

If I want to lose the weight I need to eat right and work out.  I need to continue to do this even when I get discouraged because I've gained or not lost as much as I wanted, and I need to continue to do it even after I'm feeling better and have lost the first 20lbs.  For some reason I always give up at that point-I'm feeling great, it's working, and then poof-I quit.  Why?  I'm not sure.  Maybe it's the unknown... Having self-identified as the funny fat girl my entire life, I'm not sure of who I'll be when I'm no longer what I identify as, and that is scary as hell.  It's a stupid fear, but there none-the-less.

I want to get better.  I want to be better.  I want to stop getting discouraged and push myself in spite of the fear and the doubt.  This year everything changes.  No more giving up on myself.  So this is me-"standing on the overpass screaming at myself hey-I WANNA GET BETTER!"

This week's song:

I Wanna Get Better

by Bleachers

All About That Bass {Musical Mondays & Giveaway)

This week's song:

All About That Bass

by Meghan Trainor

Did Any of Me Stick At All? {Musical Mondays & Giveaway}

What is Musical Mondays?

Musical Mondays is a weekly linky party where we share a song we're into for the week, and talk about why we like it-or why it effects us.  Along with talking about music, I host a (usually) month-long music giveaway. 

This week's song:

Stick

by Ingrid Michaelson

Think of You {Musical Mondays & Giveaway}

What is Musical Mondays?

Musical Mondays is a weekly linky party where we share a song we're into for the week, and talk about why we like it-or why it effects us.  Along with talking about music, I host a (usually) month-long music giveaway. 

This week's song:

Think of You

by MSMR

Everything Has Changed {Musical Mondays & Giveaway}

What is Musical Mondays?

Musical Mondays is a weekly linky party where we share a song we're into for the week, and talk about why we like it-or why it effects us.  Along with talking about music, I host a (usually) month-long music giveaway. 

This week's song:

Everything Has Changed

by Taylor Swift

All I knew this morning when I woke is I know something now
Know something now I didn't before
And all I've seen since 18 hours ago is green eyes
And freckles and your smile and the back of my mind making me feel like

[Chorus]
I just wanna know you better know you better know you better now

I just wanna know you better know you better know you better now

I just wanna know you better know you better know you better now

I just wanna know you know you know you

'Cause all I know is we said hello
And your eyes looking like coming home
All I know is a simple name
Everything has changed
All I know is you held the door
You'll be mine and I'll be yours, Oh
All I know since yesterday is
Everything has changed

And all my walls stood tall painted blue
And I'll take them down, take them down
And open up the door for you

And all I feel in my stomach is butterflies
The beautiful kind making up for lost time
Taking flight making me feel like

I just wanna know you better know you better know you better now

I just wanna know you better know you better know you better now

I just wanna know you better know you better know you better now

I just wanna know you know you know you

'Cause all I know is we said hello
And your eyes looking like coming home
All I know is a simple name
Everything has changed
All I know is you held the door
You'll be mine and I'll be yours, Oh
All I know since yesterday is
Everything has changed

Come back and tell me why
I'm feeling like I've missed you all this time
And meet me there tonight
Let me know that it's not all in my mind

I just wanna know you better know you better know you better now
I just want to know you know you know you
I just wanna know you know you know you

'Cause all I know is we said hello
And your eyes looking like coming home
All I know is a simple name
Everything has changed
All I know is you held the door
You'll be mine and I'll be yours, Oh
All I know since yesterday is
Everything has changed

All I know is we said hello so dust off your highest hopes
All I know is pooring rain and everything has changed
All I know is a new found grace all my days I'll know your face
All I know since yesterday is everything has changed

Such a sweet song, and how cute is that video with it?  Yes, we all know that Red by Taylor Swift is one of my guilty pleasures, but I can't help it-I just love so many of the songs!  Especially ones that make my heart happy-whether I know exactly why or not.  Perhaps right now I do.  ♥ I'm such a girly-girl sometimes.

What are you listening to this week?

Please grab the button and link up your Musical Mondays post in the linky!

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Now for the Giveaway

Enter to win a $15 Amazon Gift Card (sent directly from Amazon) courtesy of our sponsor!

This giveaway will run from Monday 5/5/14 to Sunday 6/1/14 at 12AM.  It is open worldwide.
Entering the following Rafflecopter agrees to the terms and conditions within.

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Thanks to our fantastic May Musical Mondays sponsor:

Gonna Get Over You {Musical Mondays & Giveaways}

What is Musical Mondays?

Musical Mondays is a weekly linky party where we share a song we're into for the week, and talk about why we like it-or why it effects us.  Along with talking about music, I host a month-long music related giveaway. 

This week's song:

Gonna Get Over You

by Sara Bareilles

Goodbye
Should be sayin' that to you by now, shouldn't I?
Layin' down the law that I live by, well maybe next time
I've got a thick tongue brimmin' with the words that go unsung
I simmer then I burn for someone
The wrong one

And I tell myself to let the story end
My heart will rest in someone else's hands
My why not me philosophy began

And I say
Ooooo how'm I gonna get over you?
I'll be alright, just not tonight, someday
Oh I wish you want me to stay
I'll be alright, just not tonight, someday

Maybe
It's a viscious little word that can slay me
Keep me where I'm hurting-you make me hang from your hands

But no more
I wont beg to buy a shot at your back door
If I make it at the thought of you, what for?
That's not me anymore

And i'm not the girl that I intend to be
But I dare you darlin' just you wait and see
But this time not for you, just for me
And I say

Ooooo how'm I gonna get over you?
I'll be alright, just not tonight, someday
Oh I wish you want me to stay
I'll be alright, just not tonight, someday

Say it's comin' soon
Someday without you
All I can do is get me past the ghost of you
Wave goodbye to me
I wont say I'm sorry
I'll be alright once I find the other side of someday

I love Sara.  She's one of my absolute favorite singers and I relate to most of her songs in one way or another.  Look for a post later this week that clarifies why I am relating to this song today.  Also, this video is so much fun!

What are you listening to this week?

Please grab the button and link up your Musical Mondays post in the linky!

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Now for the Giveaway

Enter to win an MP3 copy of All the Lights Out by Ingrid Michaelson (sent from Amazon)!

This giveaway will run from Monday 3/31/14 to Monday 5/1/13 at 12AM.  It is open worldwide.

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Check out my awesome Musical Mondays sponsor:

Afterlife {Musical Mondays & Giveaway}

What is Musical Mondays?

Musical Mondays is a weekly linky party where we share a song we're into for the week, and talk about why we like it-or why it effects us.  Along with talking about music, I host a month-long music related giveaway. 

This week's song:

Afterlife

by Ingrid Michaelson

When the world is breaking down around you 
Taking everything that you know
What you didn't know is that we can go forever if we want to
We can live inside of a moment-the one that we own

You and me, we've got this
You and me, we're beautiful beautiful

[Chorus]
We are we are
We're gonna be alright
We got we got
We always got the fight in us
We are we are
We're gonna live tonight
Like there's no tomorrow
'Cause we're the afterlife

Living like you're dying isn't living at all
Give me your cold hands put 'em on my heart
Raise a glass to everyone who thinks they'll never make it through this life
To live a brand new start

You and me, we've got this
You and me, we're beautiful beautiful

[Chorus]

'Cause we're the afterlife
'Cause we're the afterlife

Every time I close my eyes I hear your favorite song
Telling me not to run not to worry anymore
I can hold on tight to nothing better than the rest
So it's now or never more

[Chorus, repeats]

I love this song.  Not only does it have a great beat, but the message is fun!  Stop living for the afterlife that may never come and just be your afterlife now-live!  Go and do!  Celebrate!  Support those who don't feel like they can keep going and remind them that they can-life is for the living!  You know, all that.

Also this is Ingrid Michaelson's new album and it doesn't come out until the 15th, so I've decided that is what my giveaway for April-the brand new album Lights Out.  It sounds like it's going to be a really good one.

What are you listening to this week?

Please grab the button and link up your Musical Mondays post in the linky!

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Now for the Giveaway

Enter to win an MP3 copy of All the Lights Out by Ingrid Michaelson (sent from Amazon)!

This giveaway will run from Monday 3/31/14 to Monday 5/1/13 at 12AM.  It is open worldwide.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Check out my awesome Musical Mondays sponsor:

Body Love {Musical Mondays & Giveaway}

What is Musical Mondays?

Musical Mondays is a weekly linky party where we share a song we're into for the week, and talk about why we like it-or why it effects us.  Along with talking about music, I host a (usually) month-long music related giveaway. 

This week's song:

Body Love (Parts 1 & 2)

by Mary Lambert

*Warning-it's going to get real and there are a few F-words for those of you who don't like that sort of thing-HOWEVER (especially if you are a woman) I recommend you listen anyway.  This is so powerful.

I know girls who are trying to fit into the social norm like squeezing into last years prom dress

I know girls who are low rise, MAC eye shadow, and binge drinking

I know girls that wonder if they're disaster and sexy enough to fit in

I know girls who are fleeing bombs from the mosques of their sins 

Playing Russian Roulette with death

It's never easy to accept that our bodies are fallible and flawed

But when do we draw the line?

When the knife hits the skin isn't it the same thing as purging?

Because we're so obsessed with death

Some women just have more guts than others

The funny thing is women like us don't shoot

We swallow pills still wanting to be beautiful at the morgue

Still proceeding to put on makeup

Still hoping that the mortician finds us fuckable and attractive

We might as well be buried with our shoes, and handbags, and scarves

Girls, we flirt with death every time we etch a new tally mark into our skin.

I know how to split my writs to reveal a battlefield too

But the time has come for us to reclaim our bodies

Our bodies deserve more than to be war torn and collateral 

Offering this fuckdome as a pathetic means to say

I only know how to exist when I'm wanted

Girls like us are hardly every wanted, you know?

We're used up and sad and drunk

And perpetually waiting by the phone for someone to pick up and tell us we did good

We did good

I know I am because I said I am, I know I am because I said I am

My body is home, My body is home, My body is home

Try this

Take your hands over your bumpy love body naked

And remember the first time you touched someone with the soul purpose of learning all of them

Touch them because the light was pretty on them

And the dust and the sunlight danced the way your heart did

Touch yourself with a purpose your body is the most beautiful royal

Fathers and Uncles are not claiming your knife anymore

Are not your razor, no put the sharpness black

Lay your hands flat and feel the surface of scarred skin

I once touched a tree with charred limbs

The stump was still breathing but the tops were just ashy remains

I wonder what it's like to come back from that

Because sometimes I feel forest fires erupting from my wrists

And the smoke signals sent out are the most beautiful things I've ever seen

Love your body the way your mother loved your baby feet

And brother arm-wrapping shoulders and remember this is important

You are worth more than who you fuck

You are worth more than a waistline

You are worth more than beer bottles displayed like drunken artifacts

You are worth more than any naked body could proclaim in the shadows

You are no less valuable as a size 16 than a size 4

You are no less valuable as a 32A than a 36C

Your sexiness is defined by concentric circles within your wood it is wisdom

You are a goddamn tree trunk with leave sprouting out

Reborn

Some of you may have heard of Mary Lambert because she's the amazing female vocals on the song Same Love by Macklemore & Ryan Lewis which I shared for Musical Mondays back in September of 2013.  Did you know she released a solo LP? She's kind of amazing.  I read this article by Buzzfeed on 22 Things You Didn't Know About Mary Lambert and was impressed.  Before the Grammy performance where they married all of those couples I hadn't seen her, and I was stunned by how gorgeous she is! 

So I decided to download her album, which only has four songs-but hey it cost me less than $3. Every single song has so much emotion in it that I honestly feel like it was the best three dollars I have ever spent.  It's stunning really.   When this song came on in the car I felt like I'd been hit by a freight train.  I stopped breathing.  I listened to every word and bawled like a baby, still holding my breath, still feeling like a steam engine was plowing through me.  

This song cut me so deeply that I'm not sure I recovered for the rest of the evening.  First I sobbed for the entire 45 minute drive home, and then the rest of the evening I felt restless and sore in my chest-emotionally sore.  Raw.  I have never connected so entirely with a song that it physically effected me like this before-and while it hurt I know it's for good reasons. I need to listen to this until the words are so branded on my brain that I never forget them.  I've spent far too much of my life defining myself by who I'm sleeping with, what size I am, the number on a scale, my makeup, my clothes... This is a poignant portrayal of how we as women often think-and it's killing us.

I love when she says "love your body like your mother loved your baby feet" because that to me feels impossible. When you think about how much a mother loves the tiny feet of her baby, how she fawns over them, cries because they're so beautiful, and spends days staring at them... Well I don't know how to love my body like that, but I'd sure like to.  Pure unadulterated love with no conditions-that's a powerful emotion.  That could end the harm we do ourselves.  

What are you listening to this week?

Please grab the button and link up your Musical Mondays post in the linky!

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Now for the Giveaway

Enter to win an MP3 copy of All the Little Lights by Passenger (sent from Amazon)!

This giveaway will run from Monday 3/3/14 to Monday 3/31/13 at 12AM.  It is open worldwide.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Treacherous {Musical Mondays & Giveaway}

What is Musical Mondays?

Musical Mondays is a weekly linky party where we share a song we're into for the week, and talk about why we like it-or why it effects us.  Along with talking about music, I host a month-long music related giveaway sponsored by wonderful people! November is sponsored by me!   Read on to see details!

This week's song:

Treacherous

by Taylor Swift

Put your lips close to mine as long as they don't touch

Out of focus, eye to eye 'til the gravity is too much

And I'll do anything you say if you say it with your hands

And I'd be smart to walk away, but you're quicksand

This slope is treacherous

This path is reckless

This slope is treacherous

And I, I, I, Like it

I can't decide if it's a choice, getting swept away

I hear the sound of my own voice asking you to stay

And all we are is skin and bone trained to get along

Forever going with the flow, but you're friction

This slope is treacherous

This path is reckless

This slope is treacherous

And I, I, I Like it

Two headlights shine through the sleepless night and I will get you, get you alone

Your name has echoed through my mind and I just think you should, think you should know

That nothing safe is worth the drive and I will follow you, follow you home

I'll follow you, follow you home

This hope is treacherous

This daydream is dangerous

This hope is treacherous

I, I, I, I, I, I, I,

Two headlights shine through the sleepless night and I will get you, get you alone

Your name has echoed through my mind and I just think you should, think you should know

That nothing safe is worth the drive and I will follow you, follow you home

I'll follow you, follow you home, follow you, follow you home, follow you, follow you home

This slope is treacherous

I, I, I like it

I know, it's Taylor Swift.  I'll admit her album Red (but not any of her other albums) is kind of a guilty pleasure of mine.  I feel silly listening to Taylor Swift, but I love most of the songs on this album and sometimes just listen to this one album on repeat when I'm feeling a certain way, especially when I'm feeling girly.  This is one of my favorite songs on the album-because it explains that feeling so well... That "I really like you but this could be dangerous for me because I know how it feels to get my heart broken, but I'm throwing caution to the wind and going to enjoy the rush anyway and keep on hoping that it all works out" feeling.  Ahh, bittersweet isn't it?  Scary and amazing all in one.  

What are you listening to this week? Link Up!

It can be anything music related, but if you link up your post MUST contain the button or a link back!

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November's Musical Mondays Giveaway:

Happy November! Since this album is so fantastic, I'm going to give away one MP3 version of Prism by Katy Perry!  Open worldwide from 11/4/13 to 11/30/13.  Entering the Rafflecopter below agrees to the Terms inside.

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Same Love {Musical Mondays & Giveaway}

What is Musical Mondays?

Musical Mondays is a weekly linky party where we share a song we're into for the week, and talk about why we like it-or why it effects us.  Along with talking about music, I host a month-long music related giveaway sponsored by wonderful people! September is sponsored by me!   Read on to see details!

This week's song:
Same Love
by Macklemore & Ryan Lewis



When I was in the third grade I thought that I was gay
'Cause I could draw, my uncle was, and I kept my room straight
I told my mom, tears rushin' down my face
She's like "Ben you've liked girls since before pre-k"
Tipping, Yeah, I guess she had a point didn't she?
A bunch of stereotypes all in my head
I remember doing the math, Like yea, I'm good at little league
A pre-conceived idea of what it all meant
For those that liked the same sex, had the characterisics
The right-wing conservatives think it's a decision
And you can be cured with some treatment and religion
Man-made re-wiring of a predisposition, playing God
Ah nah, here we go, America the brave still fears what we don't know
That God loves all his children is somehow forgotten
But we paraphrase a book written 3500 years ago

[Chorus]
And I can't change
Even if I tried
Even if I wanted to
And I can't change
Even if I tried
Even if I wanted to
My love, my love, my love
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm
She keeps me warm

If I was gay I would think Hip Hop hates me
Have you read the YouTube comments lately?
"Man, that's gay" gets dropped on the daily
We've become so numb to what we're saying
A culture founded from oppression
Yeah, we don't have acceptance for 'em
Call each other "faggots" behind the keys of a message board
A word rooted in hate yet our genre still ignores it
And gay is synonymous with the lesser
It's the same hate that's caused wars from Religion
Gender to skin color, the complexion of your pigment
The same fight that led people to walk outs and sit ins
It's human rights for everybody there is no difference
So live on, and be yourself
When I was at church they taught me something else
If you preach hate at the service those words aren't anointed
That holy water that you soaked in has been poisoned
When everyone else is more comfortable remaining voiceless
Rather than fighting for humans that have had their rights stolen
I might not be the same, but that's not important
No freedom til we're equal
Damn right, I support it

[Chorus]

We press play, don't press pause
Progress march on with the bill of rights
We turn our back on the cause
Until the day that my uncles can be united by law
And kids aren't walking around the hallway plagued by pain in their heart
Or a world so hateful someone would rather die than be who they are
And a certificate on paper isn't gonna solve it all
But it's a damn good place to start
No law is gonna change us, we have to change us
Whatever God you believe in, we come from the same one
Strip away the fear, underneath it's all about the same love

[Chorus]

Love is patient, love is kind
Love is patient, love is kind
Not crying on Sundays
Not Crying on Sundays
I'm not Crying on Sundays
[repeat x3]

Not only is this song completely and utterly fantastic and full of love, but the video is wonderfully directed with beautiful filming.  I don't care what you believe in, or which god you pray to, but I completely agree with this song that it's all about love.  At the heart of almost every religion is Love.  If you strip away all the politics, and other things, you're left with love.  Love love love.

I didn't post this to start a debate.  You all know where I stand on this issue.  I am all about love.  We can disagree, but I still love you-just as I love my friends and family that are gay, and just as I love those who aren't.  If you leave a negative/nasty comment on this post It'll be deleted-so just walk away if you disagree.  I. Still. Love. You.  ♥

On another note, I am so totally and completely in love with Macklemore, it's not even funny.  LOVE.

Link up your Musical Monday choice this week!

It can be anything, but if you link up your post MUST contain the button or a link back!

<center> </p> <p style="text-align: center;"> <a href="http://www.mysocalledchaos.com/search/label/Musical%20Mondays"><img src="http://i725.photobucket.com/albums/ww257/agofish/For%20Blog/MUSICALMONDAYS_zpse9de9ff4.png" alt="Musical Mondays"></a>

Now for the Giveaway

I'm giving one lucky winner an MP3 copy of MC Souleye's new album, Iron Horse Running.  To read a little more about this album and MC Souleye please see this Musical Monday post from 9/2/13.  The CD will be sent through Amazon MP3, is open Worldwide, and ends on October 1st, 2013.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Cassiopeia {Musical Mondays & Giveaway)

What is Musical Mondays?

Musical Mondays is a weekly linky party where we share a song we're into for the week, and talk about why we like it-or why it effects us.  Along with talking about music, I host a month-long music related giveaway sponsored by wonderful people!  July is sponsored by Joanna Marie Art who is giving away a musical makeover for an old pair of shoes for you!  I'll explain more later in this post-let's get to the music.

This week's song:
Cassiopeia
by Sara Bareilles



Come in close now it's time to tell a story
Long ago and so many years before we ever were
Ever dreamed we even could be
There was her and her very first heart beat
All alone in the corner of the night sky
Spiral bones of a supernova starlight
Fell in love with another burning bright
She dreamed a way to ignite

She said "Tonight,
Come on, come on, collide
Break me to pieces, I
I think you're just like heaven, why
Come on, come on, collide
Let's see what a fire feels like
I'll bet it's just like heaven
Just like heaven, just like heaven...

Such a shame
No where near even the near mist
Light years away from the hope of being sunkissed
Anchored home in her interstellar sea, but
Poor lonely Cassiopeia

So she sighs and she burns with desperation
Learns to cry over love of constellations
Then the spark of a star shooting too close
They both smiled
What a day to explode

She said "Tonight,
Come on, come on, collide
Break me to pieces, I
I think you're just like heaven, why
Come on, come on, collide
Let's see what a fire feels like
I'll bet it's just like heaven
Just like heaven, just like heaven...

Long ago in a sky built before us
A supernova grew up to be star dust

I know I picked a Sara Bareilles song last week as well, but I can't help but choose another.  Her new album The Blessed Unrest is fantastic and I've been listening to it on repeat since it came out.   She played with sound on a lot of these songs and when Cassiopeia came on at first I thought "What is this?" but after listening to it once... then three times, I was madly in love with it and belting it out in the car right along with her.  

It's passionate, and let's face it-I need a little more passion in my life!  I feel like she's begging the stars to allow her to feel some kind of great love, something that shakes her up inside and leaves her feeling that fire... I haven't felt that fire in a long time.  

What are you listening to?

Please make sure you grab the button or link back if you're linking up.

<center> <a href="http://www.mysocalledchaos.com/search/label/Musical%20Mondays"><img src="http://i725.photobucket.com/albums/ww257/agofish/For%20Blog/ChantillyMusicalMondays_zps155c27b0.jpg" alt="Musical Mondays"></a> </center>




Now for the giveaway:

The last day to enter is Wednesday, July 31st!  Joanna Marie Art is giving away a musical makeover for an old pair of your shoes! You'll mail her an old pair of shoes (heels recommended, but not required-though you may have to work out with her if they're something too far off) and she'll give them a sheet music makeover like her cute heels shown in this post! a Rafflecopter giveaway Giveaway is open to US & Canada only.  Entries will be verified.

You will have to ship your heels to Joanna in the US.  See rafflecopter for full terms and conditions.