Glitter In The Air

Have you ever fed a lover with just your hands?

Close your eyes and trust it, just trust it

Have you ever thrown a fist full of glitter in the air?

Have you ever looked fear in the face

And said I just don't care

It's only half past the point of no return

The tip of the ice burg

The sun before the burn

The thunder before lightning

The breathe before the Fraze

Have you ever felt this way?

Have you ever hated yourself for staring at the phone?

You're whole life waiting on the ring to prove you're not alone

Have you ever been touched so gently you had to cry?

Have you ever invited a stranger to come inside?

It's only half past the point of oblivion

The hourglass on the table

The walk before the run

The breathe before the kiss

And the fear before the flames

Have you ever felt this way?

La La La La La La La La

There you are, sitting in the garden

Clutching my coffee,

Calling me sugar

You called me sugar

Have you ever wished for an endless night?

Lassoed the moon and the stars and pulled that rope tight

Have you ever held your breathe and asked yourself will it ever get better than tonight?

Tonight

-Glitter in the Air by Pink

So Kristina and I went out for a girls night last night. The plan was to go to a movie together and then go shopping to get Matt something for his birthday. We ended up going and seeing He's Just Not That Into You which had a slew of names in it. Click here to see the who they all are. Basically in the story you have the couple who got married right out of college, the couple who's been together for 7 years and he wont marry her, the lonely girl longing to find true love but who scares them all away with her desperation, the guy who's in love with the girl who doesn't really want him but strings him along, the girl who keeps meeting guys online, and the guy who becomes the friend who points out that the guys just aren't that into the lonely girl. It was crazy, and there were times through the movie where we were just about yelling at the screen because these people were SO messed up. It was cute, and ended kind of cute, but it was also a little depressing. It really makes me lose more and more faith in my species, because all the while you're sitting there thinking "these characters are pretty real" and then shaking your head because it's so pathetic.

Then of course Kristina and began talking and analyzing the movie on our way to the car and then applying it to our lives and our relationships. This made me even more depressed. It's not like I have any lack of love life, by any means, it's just that it's all so confusing to me! I just don't know if I'm coming or going, or which way is up anymore. The main problem seems to be that what I want, and how I feel, fluctuate so often that I not only leave my partners spinning, but myself as well.

I wont lie, I'm a still a little hurt that I was forgotten. He left me a message apologizing and saying he "spaced it." What is that? Just about the time I make up my mind to stop running and put myself in place to just go with the flow and perhaps take a leap in the right direction, he goes and forgets me. It's this "one step forward, two steps back" thing and now I don't know what to do. What I want is no mystery to me, but how I want to get there, the path is yet undetermined...

Anyway, Kristina and I ended up driving around for 2 hours last night and didn't get home until about 3am. We just looped through all of the neighborhoods in Layton, South Weber, Riverdale, and South Ogden with the windows down and singing along at the top of our lungs to Alanis. It was exhilarating and helped clear our heads and give us a small rush when life can become so monotonous sometimes. It was worth being extra tired today, and I loved it!