Dear So & So, I'm Happy Damnit!

Dear Ross,

I wish I had noticed that my new T-shirt has a  hole in the boob.  It's such a cute shirt, and this is the FIRST time I've worn it and it has a hole in it.  Oh well, I guess I'll just deal with it.  It does look kind of like an 80s shirt, so maybe the grunge look will work... Ugh, I don't want to drive all the way back to South Jordan to get another one.

Signed,

An unsatisfied but lazy Customer.

Dear New England Confectionary Company or NECCO®,

No, I do not like your new recipe for your Sweethearts.  Once a year I really look forward to the softer, larger, conversation hearts and this year I found myself disappointed in what I found.  No longer is the white candy there, and all of the other flavors are now different.  They're more tart.   While these candies are ok, they're nothing like the favorites of my youth.

What I am impressed with, however, is your response to my complaint.  I've never emailed a candy company a complaint before, but I was shocked to find your timely response waiting for me in my inbox when I got home that evening.  Thank you for being so thoughtful and actually (I could tell) reading my email.  Also, thank you for telling me that I could still find the old recipe at the Dollar store... I am so going there and finding some.

Signed,

A disgruntled, but still loyal consumer.

Dear Valentines Singles Awareness Day,

I hate you.  Once a year you sneak your way into my life and the stores around me and rub it in my face that I'm incapable of finding something meaningful with a good guy.  Besides, for those people coupled up, why do they need one day a year to remind them to tell their partners they love them?  Why can't they do that every day?  Stupid cupid.

Signed,

An old maid by Utah's standards

Dear Utah Weather,

Please, I'm begging you, stop toying with my heart so.  One moment it's bright and sunny and I'm looking out the window longing for spring-then the next you're dumping more of this snow shit on me.  Please just stop.

Signed,

Someone who has to commute to work and can't wait to go hiking.

Dear Company I Work For,

Please keep me on at the end of the season.  I'm pretty sure if you lay me off after Tax season, I wont be coming back next year.  I am very good at my job, I'm a hard worker, and you need me!

Signed,

Your seasonal employee that needs a perminent position.

Dear Coworker I'm not so secretly attracted to,

Why do you have to be so cute?  No worries, I wont pursue anything nor am I pining.  I'm just sayin'... 

Signed,

Someone who has recently learned the dangers of dating coworkers.

Dear T1 Support Agents Who NEVER Seem To Get It,

GET IT ALREADY!  FREAK!

YOU'VE BEEN HERE LONG ENOUGH BY NOW TO NOT BE SO DENSE!  PAY ATTENTION!

Signed,

Annoyed T2 who hates having to tell you the same thing over and over again!

Dear Missy,

Thanks so much for the pretty award, I heart it so much!

Signed,

My So-Called Chaos

Check out more letters over at Kat's

***

Play Happy Hour Friday over at Otin's or Rxbambi's

• 
  
  I'm happy that I got to spend some time with my grandmother, and that her memory seems to be working better again.  Hopefully she'll get to come home soon.
• 
  
  I'm happy that my cousin Melanie is coming in on Monday from California, I miss her!
• 
  
  I'm happy it only snowed for a few minutes.
• 
  
  I'm happy to open up blogger and find that I have 40 followers today!
• 
  
  I'm happy that blogging keeps me from going insane at work.
• 
  
  I'm happy that the drama at work seems to have subsided, and I'm now smiling and conversing with the dramatic parties involved.  The office feels less negative now.
• 
  
  I'm happy that it only snowed for a few minutes.  Hopefully it wont come back today.
• 
  
  I'm happy to have an amazing roommie who is my best friend and an amazing cook.  Homemade Mac & Cheese last night was super-win.
• 
  
  I'm happy that I have such awesome friends and coworkers that have become friends.
• 
  
  I'm happy that everyone finds my love of gay men, and my encouragements for everyone to indulge in such activities, to be so hilarious. 
• 
  
  I'm happy there are at least some Tier 1 agents who know what they're doing.
• 
  
  I'm happy my coworkers make me laugh all the time at work, so even the rough days are better.
• 
  
  I'm happy that saying "I'm happy" so many times in a row actually encouraged an overall feeling of happiness.  Why don't you try it?