So for those of you who read Saturday's post, you'll know that I finally stood up for myself and told [womanizer] that I wouldn't be seeing him again because of how shitty he's treated me in the past. If you didn't read it, check it out really quick HERE for a little background on today's post. No need for me to go into it again, other than I was really proud of myself. In fact, I was pretty much walking around with my head held high and in a good mood over the whole thing. On that post you may have also seen the anonymous comments left for me, it's just too bad you couldn't see the shocked look on my face. Jaw. On. Floor.
Basically it was another girl writing in telling me that she's been watching me for about two years, because we were dating the same guy. What. The. Hell? WE WERE DATING THE SAME GUY! I never knew about her, but apparently she knew about me, and apparently he treated her the same way.
I am shocked. He always just said he was working two jobs, or really busy, I didn't expect him to be out seeing other people and not telling me. There were promises made about always telling the truth and being honest with each other, no matter what we were up to. Call me naive, but I took his word and trusted it.
I am shocked. That makes two guys in a row! How does this shit happen to me? I swear to god I'm just a regular little person in this world, but lately my life seems like a scene from a Soap Opera! At least it provides me with good blogging material right?
I am appalled. Here's the part where I add the following: WHAT AN ASSHOLE.
In case you missed it, here's what she said, and what I was thinking when I read it.
Hi Angie,You don't know me but I know of you and exactly what you are going through with [womanizer].The reason I know this is because I've gone through the exact same thing with him as well. I met him the spring of 2008, just before you met him. I was however told of his assignment in Ft.Benning and wished him well as he left to do his job. When he came back however I was never told of a Brothers wedding, I in fact know he only has one sibling (A Sister) I was told he was sent home on medical furlow due to a accident involving sky diving. Who know what the truth actually is.
He told me he didn't know about his assignment, and that it just happened to fast to let me know. Yeah, what a douche. I should have realized that was a lie, but even through my annoyance at it, I felt a connection with it and took him at his word.
But in any case, I started a relationship with him for the few months he was home. Things had gone really well and I thought we had grown closer and had such a fun time with him when we were together. He had told me that while he was gone we would stay close. Then he left again late that summer (Around the end of July if I remember correctly) We also had that same long distance relationship and alot of sweet loving words were said over the phone. It was while he was gone I found out about you.
Again, what he told me and what happened were apparently two different things. I was told that he was only in town for three days! That's why we only got together once, and then it was just phone calls after that. Also, he was probably saying all the same things on the phone to us both! What a bastard!
I am a pretty gifted witch and something he said to me one night back in the fall of 2008 just didn't sit right, so I did some magical work and was led straight to you. Not only you, but other women as well. I knew of his sexual past and some of his more interesting fetishes so I tried not think to much about it at the time. (I had really fallen seriously in love with [womanizer] at this time and didn't want to face the truth)It wasn't until he got home a year ago last march when things started to happen in a more serious manner.
I saw him the day after he got home....And like you, he was ready to start a serious relationship with me. I had let go of the feelings of untruthfulness with him because I was so in love with him and really really wanted to believe I was the only one. The sex for the first 4 to 6 weeks was incredible but then the lies started to come to the surface again, He started to stand me up as well, sometimes I wouldn't even get a phone call.
He was ready to start a relationship with a both! He was telling us both he wanted something serious! WHAT A BASTARD. I don't think there is any limit to the number of times I can call him a bastard, in fact I think we should contact Merriam-Websters and have them change the definition from "an illegitimate child" to "[womanizer]: See also, dick, asshole, prick, fucktard, and whiney little bitch."
After I dug around a little and with my special gifts, I learned he was standing me up to see you and other women. And I get the feeling that he was standing you up to see me and the others as well. I confronted him about you, told him I knew all about you....his answer to me about you was....Angie is a child who doesn't know what she wants, I would never in a million years be with a girl like Angie.
So I'm a little child who doesn't know what I want? Yes, I didn't know what I wanted back then, mainly because the guy I was dating was gone all the time and treating me like shit. He can't expect to come home and jump right into a serious relationship (with multiple women, but that's another story) and expect me to be ready right away. He can't expect me to just forget all the times he stood me up. Normal people date for a while (you know, in person) before deciding to be serious with each other.
What I LOVE about that statement is the way I signed my email to him Friday night, before I knew any of this. After telling him I deserved someone more worthy than him, someone who was a decent human being, I said "I finally know what I want, and I wont settle for less." It doesn't get any more perfect than this.
The lies were flooding out of him. I stopped talking to him around June of last year. It was around 2 months(About August)when he came knocking on my email window with an apology and wanting to see me again. And of course the old feelings of love came forth and I let him back in my life. This time for only about 6 weeks when the lies started again. I was finding out he was lying to me about the stupidest things and when I actually called him on it he turned it all around on me and told me I was crazy needy and clingy and he needed to step back. The truth of the matter was he was trying to hide the fact he was becoming an alcoholic.(Which I can clearly see that right now he is a full blown alcoholic, its really sad)
A: Karma's a bitch.
B: August was just about when he came knocking at my door again too, then had a total break down and said he couldn't handle a relationship and said he started seeing a shrink. The guy was actually telling me he couldn't date me until he was healed (as per his shrink) but that he wanted me to wait for him to be ready. That's when I finally said "Fuck this noise" and started moving on with my life. I'm so grateful that I did!
4 months went by and once again, here he comes knocking on my Yahoo IM wanting some love and forgiveness, With extreme caution, I saw him once around his birthday and that was the last time I've seen him. He's stood me up twice times since then and it has become very clear he is avoiding me. I truly believe it was because I told him no sex till he got his shit together and started to treat me right.
Wow, it really shows a man's character to see that when you present him with the option of not having sex, he disappears. This shows what he really wants you for, the sex. I never want to be with another person who uses me for just sex, in fact, I'd kind of like to cut off his balls..
Oh. Enough taking the high road, the dude already had a hard time getting it up. He blamed it on shrapnel or something, which could be, but it doesn't change the fact that the boy is still a limp noodle. Maybe it's really guilt, since he's treating all of these different women like trash. Serves him right.
I'm so happy to see you grow stronger and be able to move on from this man. Something I'm finding a very very difficult task. Ive watched you for the last two years from afar Angie and this last blog you've posted has shown me just what a remarkable young lady you truly are. Even when I knew about you and became extremely jealous I sent you blessing from afar that you may one day grow into your own power and into the wonderful individual you truly are.
I knew who she was when I saw her anon comments. It's funny, I know because the first fight [womanizer] and I ever had was over her and I playing that stupid "Own Your Friends" game on Myspace. It doesn't take gifts to remember that he was upset that we were both buying him in that stupid game, and at the time he just told me that she had been a friend with benefit in the past that he was only friends with now and he hardly saw her because she still had feelings for him that he didn't return. I should have seen right through it then. Asshole.
Being the gifted witch that I am, a witch who can manifest nearly anything into my life, who can bring myself money when I need it,that I never worry about a job nor do I worry about a lack of abundance in my life due to my craft, yet I seem to not be able to move past this thing called [womanizer]. I fell in love with him the moment I saw him and have just not been able to let go since that day. I am so proud that you were able to the hard thing I just can't. You have given me hope.I give you blessings Angie that you continue to grow and be strong in yourself. That your power may manifest beautiful wonderful magnificent things into your life. I bless you Angie that your true soul mate may one day find you and treat you just the way you deserve to be treated. I bless you in this way that maybe the Gods may see me and take pity on a broken soul, a soul broken by [womanizer], and that they may help me to put it back together again and move on from the pain he has caused me.My the Goddesses help me for I still love him.....Trusting him, that's a whole different story. I don't trust that big man as far as I can throw him......But Love him yes.I Bless you Angie!!!!!
I wrote her back, sympathizing with her and offering her support, and she has since emailed me trying to explain why she is still waiting for him even after all of this bullshit. She said the Universe/Gods/Guides are telling her he's her soul mate and she needs to stick it out. Unfortunately at this time I don't think I can be that support for her. The Universe told me to stick it out with him, and look where it got me? I thought I was going to marry him and be with him forever, and it was honestly a feeling I felt I was getting from the powers that be, but I was wrong. So very wrong.
Though I had moved on before I found this out, it doesn't change the fact that it was a serious blow to me. That's two guys in a row that were liars and cheats, two guys I settled for when I should have been out finding someone real.
Two fakes that can really go fuck themselves.
I wasted just over two years of my life with these jackasses, and I'm done wasting time. The next guy is going to be Mr. Right. Not Mr. Right Now. If they can't make the grade, I'm done. If I catch them in a lie, they're gone. No second chances, no more bullshit. I will not go through this again.
Sorry, I just can't do it right now. I appreciate all of the nice things you've said, and I'm sorry you have to go through it too... I just need time to step back from the whole thing and breath. For now, all I can do is wish for you the healing and strength that is due you.
*Post edited on 9/11/12: Check out my post called Blog Standards & Why I Don't Delete Posts to find out why!
