Photography: When I Grow Up

For my final project in my Intro to Photography class, we were required to tell a story with a series of photographs.  We were also required to print them out and mount them in order to show them off in class.  The professor's biggest stipulation?  Don't be boring.  A point most of my classmates did surprisingly well on-it was fun to see all the projects!

I ran through a bunch of different ideas... Ranging from documenting a day in the life of different people I knew (moms, technical support representatives, kids, etc.) to documenting a road trip to buy lottery tickets and discount liquor-since you can't get either of those in Utah.  Instead, I ended up enlisting my 10 year old goddaughter in a project I've titled "When I Grow Up".  The idea behind the story being her documenting and trying out all of the things she wants to be when she grows up, but ultimately deciding to just stay a kid for a while longer... Here's that story.

Right now she's obsessed with rocks, so the Geologist is her main career goal.  Ultimately, she did find it super tedious and beg to go back out and play with the other kids, so the project was slightly self-fulfilling-which is good, because this cute girls needs to stop trying to grow up so fast.

What did you want to be when you were little?

Falkner Family Photos

This weekend I went up to my second family's place for Courtney's going away party.  Courtney joined the Navy, and left Monday morning for boot camp, so we wanted to get some family photos in before she left.  Just look how grown up she is!

So we took the family and my DSLR up to Beus Pond in Ogden.  Man there were so many memories that came flooding back being up there.  Melanie Grace and I used to wear our witchy skirts and run through the sprinklers at 2AM... Many times we trekked up there for a night walk around the pond, or a day exploration through the back paths so full of ferns it looked like a hidden fairy land.  We definitely had some good times, and while it looks much less alive in the dead of winter, it was a beautiful backdrop for photos anyway.

This also follows directly after Ken and Kristina's eleventh wedding anniversary.  Eleven is a good long time to be married!

I am so very far from professional.  I have a nice camera, but I'm seeing where I definitely lack in the skill to take anything that looks professional.  Thank goodness I'm taking a class-we're going to have to do a new round of family photos this summer so that I can compare my skill level.

Life Updates & Confessions

I got my custom illustration from Fat Babe Designs, and isn't it cute?  I love the watercolor background!

I confess... I bought an iPad.  I've had a hard time justifying the purchase since it's expensive and I already have an iPhone and a laptop.   But my laptopt went wonky and had to go into the shop, and I decided-hey!  I have a disposable income (because I have no kids!) so why the eff not?  I've been loving it-the picture above I drew with a crappy stylus using the Paper by Fifty-Three app.  So cool.

I also got a killer deal... I went for the 32GB one which costs $499, but bought it from Target... I ended up paying $498 out of pocket for the iPad and the case (normally $39.99) plus they gave me a $100 Target gift card with purchase.  So I really only spent $398.  That also included my roommate's employee discount, a 5% discount for signing up for the Red Card, and a 5% discount for letting the employee talk me into buying a case too.  BONUS! 

I confess... A couple of weekends ago I went up and spent the night at Kristina's.  We drove up to Ogden to pick up Courtney from her boyfriend's apartment... Which just so happens to be the same complex as my very first apartment... The apartment I shared with my first boyfriend and then MelanieGrace.  A time so rich in memories that standing there in front of that building looking up at the windows I'd see every day brought waves of nostalgia rushing over me.  It was pretty surreal.

I confess... I like my godkids... They're pretty much the only kids I go out of my way to spend time with (maybe I'm getting old and enjoying being child-free). And just look at baby Kat's mini gelly shoes.  I DIE.

I confess... I've been super tight-lipped about the whole boy/dating thing.  I'm just about ready to tell all-but mostly because it was Frank (you may remember me mentioning him briefly last November) that I let back in my life, and he's already out of it again.  Of course I still have to deal with him since we have friends in common and other stupid life events that I should have never gotten myself into... But let me just say-he turned out to be nothing like what I thought he was.  I'm not even sure "real" nice guys exist-or at least are single anymore.  This adorable little piece of art is by a fab artist and motivational source, Emm Roy.

I confess... I'm so lucky to have some fabulous people who support me in my life.  

I confess... I've been really bad about the gym the last three weeks... I went twice last week.  None yet this week.  UGH.  What is my issue?  I'm failing so hard at the #NOEXCUSES challenge...

I confess... Here's a little sneak peak at a giveaway I have coming up soon.  I'm terrible at painting my nails, but look how pretty these two colors are!  That's Pink! and Punked from Firecracker Lacquer!

Have you seen this?  Oh my goodness.  So clever-watch it now or you're really missing out! 

Linking up with:

Childless

Do you have children?  It's a question you're asked a lot by a vast majority of people, sometimes several times during a week.  In a state (Utah) where the average marrying age for women is 23 and 26 for men (the lowest in the nation with the national average being 28 for men and 26 for women), and where most often it feels a lot more like 19 is the average, being a 27 year old girl with no husband and no children can sometimes feel a lot like being the "old maid" when you respond with  "No, I'm single and childless" and get typical "Oh, I see." response.

Now, it doesn't bother me at all to be asked-I understand why it's a popular question.  People want to connect with each other in any way they can.  Mothers want to be friends with other Mothers, those of us that don't have kids like to be able to relate a little, and honestly when it comes to dating that's something important you should know before proceeding.  The harder question to answer is Do you want kids?

It's a question that has been on my mind for the vast majority of my adult life.  Growing up I never really thought about it, but as you start dating and looking for potential partners it's something that comes up and starts needing to be addressed-and let's face it-they want to know. For the first half of my twenties I thought I desperately needed to have children one day, even though I wasn't really in a rush to get started.

When I got into my first relationship at 19 it was definitely an issue.  My boyfriend was adamant that he never wanted children, mostly due to the really rough childhood he'd had and the mental illness that ran in his family.  I bounced between denying that I wanted them, and thinking that one day he'd change his mind.  (One bit of advice ladies, don't ever expect someone to change their minds-you can't base a future on that.)  So I pushed it back, we were young and it wasn't something that needed to be addressed at that moment anyway.  We didn't last due to completely unrelated issues, so it was never something we had to worry about.

After that, I dated a lot of guys who said they didn't want children.  It never really mattered too much, I kept with the same denial I had started with, but mostly I never got as far in those relationships to wonder if it mattered.  Then I met [Sneeze].  He was so badly burned from a previous divorce that he swore up and down that he never wanted to get married again or have any more children, but he had two.  They were good kids and I came to love and raise them as my own during the times that we had them, I was a second mother to them.  But eventually that came to an end, and since they weren't really my children I had to let them go.  That may have been the hardest thing I've ever had to do.

These days I find that the older I get, the less it matters and the less it's on my mind.  Maybe my biological clock has finally given up on me, but I no longer get "baby hungry", and I find that I rather enjoy being childless.  Don't get me wrong, I love kids-I like them once they get to the cute age where they start doing stuff (you know, once they're out of the "loaf of bread" stage where all they do is eat, sleep, and cry) and I love spending time with my god-kids and friends' kids.  They're fantastic.

What I also love though, is not having to wake up a hundred times a night to a screaming baby.  I like my mostly disposable income, not needing to find a babysitter when I go out, and having alone time.  It's not about being selfish-or maybe it is-but I don't think I should give all of that up just because society tells me I'm supposed to want and have children.

Can I honestly say I do or don't want children? No.  I'm still undecided.  I figure in time it'll work itself out when it needs to and I'm in no rush to figure it all out.  I know I tend to lean towards the idea of adopting children much more than the thought of having my own, and I know that if I ever decide to have kids I will be a damn good mother since I've had lots of practice already, but that doesn't mean that is how it'll end up.  For now, I'm finally alright without the rush.  It's not something that has to be decided right now-when did we all forget how to take our time and enjoy the ride?  I'll get to that decision when I get to it.

What about you?  How do you feel on the subject?

Life Lately

I just realized I haven't written a personal post in quite a while.  Phew, February has been so extremely busy!  Here's a little update on life lately! I'll break it down into some categories so I can play catch up.

Last weekend was full of fun!  On Saturday Ken & Kristina texted me to see if Josh and I wanted to go to the Natural History Museum with them to see the Chocolate Exhibit! It was a lot of fun to go through and wander around with them and the kids-and honestly, awesome just to get out of the house for a bit.

Then on Sunday night I went up to Ken & Kristina's to spend the night.  Kristina, Ashley, Courtney, and I crafted the evening away-they were headed to the Walk the Earth Concert the following week (tonight actually) so they wanted to make galaxy shirts.  So I joined in just for fun.  We also made some fun plates.

Monday was spent shopping and playing with the baby-I love days off from work where I can go play! 

Also, I booked my plane tickets to go to Oregon for Spring Break!  I could not be more excited... I miss the ocean so much!  Oh and Mr. Bingo, I miss him too-so it'll be nice to go visit.

Recently over at Chaotic Goddess Swaps we had our Books 'n' Bloggers Swap.  That one is always a favorite, and we were surprised to get nearly quadruple the amount of swappers we usually do!  So exciting!  

I was paired up with the awesome and ever-sweet Harlynn from Mind Your Madness!  That girl is crazy-cool and she sent me some awesome books as well as some handmade bookmarks (which my goddaughter Kailee promptly stole-and I had to fight her just to get the two I liked most back-so I don't have photos! lol).  She got me The Artist's Way (from my wishlist), Hush Hush (A book she hasn't read but sounds interesting), and Looking for Alaska (A book she loves-but is also on my wishlist yay!)

Also in case you didn't notice we just announced the Mug O'Comfort Swap with an awesome giveaway too! Sign-ups start Monday over at Chaotic Goddess Swaps.

Currently here on My So-Called Chaos we have a lot going on.  Voting for the final round of the Best of Blog Awards, a big 5 Year Blogiversary Giveaway, a $25 Sephora Gift Card Giveaway, the Musical Monday's Giveaway, and so much more coming up!  Stay tuned!

School might just be killing me... But I'm getting by.  I've decided I really don't care for my Hybrid English class... I would prefer it just be in class or just online-instead of having all of the homework for online class (like 5 papers a week) and still having to meet with the professor during the week.  Boo.

I was struggling with French this semester because she's going a lot faster than my last professor did, and then we go into passe compose and all of it's rules and gah.  I got a C on the first test.  A C.  I got pretty much all As last semester.  Such a let-down.  BUT my professor is awesome and lets you take it home and redo parts of it for half credit-so hopefully I bumped it up to a B! We had our second test last night and I think I did much better on it.  I'm also getting much better at understanding it and also being able to carry ona  conversation.  Josh and I try to tell each other about our days in french to help me learn.

Work has been crazy busy.  We introduced a new tool-and as always there are a bunch of kinks to work out that result in a harder time for a while.  Also Shawn (who's the only other person managing the email queue with me) was out most of last week due to bronchitis so playing catch up has been fun.  Oh well.  I'm looking forward to Spring Break when I have a week off of both school and work and will be in Oregon by the beach.  LOVE! 

On another work front, I'm working on some new ideas for my Etsy shop.  I hope to reopen some time in the next few months with a whole new product line.  Yay! 

Ugh.  I'm pretty sure I gained back everything I lost... My shirts don't fit as well, I feel more sluggish and sick than I have in the past... Mostly I've put a bunch of really crappy food in me.  But I'm getting back to my juicing & smoothies-just keep chugging along... 

So I got my tax return back... Yeah it was pretty nice, who knew being a student earned you such a good rebate?  The smart thing to do would be to put it towards my student loans I'll eventually have to pay back... But am I going to do the smart thing?  Nah.  I paid off my credit cards, I booked my ticket for Oregon, and I'm going to finally by my DSLR!  Ok, so some of those can be construed as smart still... Like paying of the cards, booking a trip that will keep me from burning out or losing my mind, and also the camera can be used to further my online business!  Score! 

But I've also done a hefty bit of shopping in the last little while...  I went shopping this past weekend and bought a new coffee table & 3 new pillows from IKEA, as well as some 600 thread count Egytion Cotton Sheets (HEAVEN!) and a new book.  I also picked up these awesome prints at the auction for CFPU a couple weekends ago.

I also received these awesome goodies on trade!  Yes, I do some trade now!  Love it!  The eyeshadows are from Printcess and the gorgeous art & bookmarks are from Patric Bates.

What have you been up to?