The Musician is an illusion. Nothing more.
I feel like such a fool for letting myself be happy. For letting myself buy into the lies.
I feel so deceived.
I hate myself for believing it.
I hate myself for always being this person.
I hate that I couldn't just have one happy holiday season, I was so happy and so excited and now it's all crashing down. I have to end it. I will not be the girl that lets herself get fooled over and over again. I will not be that person who lays down and lets herself be walked over.
When do I get to be happy?
Im sorry....... im a musician too and we have a bad reputations..and its deserved im sorry to say.....
ReplyDeletebuck up though!
I'm sorry. I know how you feel. I've had it happen to me a lot. Keep your chin up and your head held high.
ReplyDeleteThe truth is, YOU make your own happiness. No one else can do that. Even falling in love with someone doesn't happen without your consent on some level. As a woman who has had her heart broken more times than I can count, I counsel time. And patience with yourself.
ReplyDeleteIf it helps, I found that dedicating myself to being single for a year opened my eyes a lot to what I need, want, and most importantly, what I enjoy about myself. I highly recommend it.